Dirt nap - April 2, 2007

When I left for my run this morning, I saw a bum sleeping on the first baseline of the park that's next to my building. He had his hands locked over his chest like he was dead or something. Bums crash there all the time. They sleep on or under the cement tables next to the park, not on the field itself, and certainly not on the dirt part of the field. Strange, no?

Well sure enough, by the time I was finished with my run, the park was flanked by the following: two cop cars, an ambulance, the coroner and a crowd of onlookers having a hoopla while the coroner took the last portraits of bum dude. Some white chick who sounded like Fran Drescher was calling her friend to come "look at the body." I gotta say, New Yorkers, I love your city, but you's a coldhearted bunch. And it's not cool. So much negative energy on the streets, this California girl--who hates everything about California except, EXCEPT, the constant, unrelenting flow of positive energy--cleans her aura ten times a day. I swear to God, I'll clean it and feel wonderful, and ten minutes later I'm due for a buffup, some sage and five more white candles from Duane Reade. I'm not even going to get into how cheery and well-adjusted your dead people are. You people are doomy. I wish I could stock this place with earth muffins.

But seriously, poor bum guy. I'm almost, sort of thinking about praying for him. Shit, what else can you do? They're everywhere around here, not even asking for money, help or food. It's just over for them. The shelters are a mile up the street and they've been to them fifty times, never getting their shit together. They want death or whatever awful stasis you find them in, just wandering around looking for a vent to sleep under. They're not even human anymore, they're so broken. But that doesn't mean anybody should make a circus out of their death for wont of something to do. It's Manhattan for chrissakes.

Posted by The Bunny at 7:47 AM

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Last time I was in NY, I was in a restaurant at a window seat table. I was about to bite into my lunch when I saw a homeless lady and her two elementary-school-aged kids huddled against the building's egress, counting out a handful of coins. I felt sick. I asked to get my lunch to go, ordered two more burgers, fries and milkshakes, and deposited the bag in the woman's arms. She looked stunned. My NYC-dwelling friends were appalled. "Now she's going to hang out here all the time," they complained. I told them to fuck off.

Posted by: M at April 3, 2007 11:15 AM

I find this to be a little steriotypical. First, if you were here during 9/11, and I apologize for playing this card, you would've seen the most admirable displays of humanity. I know, as I saw a lot that day. Secondly, I have lived here for almost 15 years and do not know any Manhattanites with a Fran Drescher laugh. That's outer-borough or Long Island.

Posted by: Denise at April 3, 2007 03:12 PM

Did you fail to notice the poster? Nice change to the OP, Tucker.

Posted by: Jezebel at April 3, 2007 03:40 PM

Wow. In response to Denise: I never judge a person or peoples by how they react in a crisis. Anyone is capable of being a hero then. How people react and treat one another during their everyday life is a truer testament of their character. It's about time the 9/11 card came out of the deck don't you think?

Posted by: Mike at April 3, 2007 04:22 PM

yeah, this one time, we all used to be really nice, so fuck off. how lame. humanity is not what you show during a disaster. humanity should probably be reserved for everyday living. i think the 911 card belongs with the race/jew/fat/homosexual/slut card. well, maybe not the slut card.

Posted by: toni at April 3, 2007 04:34 PM

I have lived in small town USA and haven't seen the likes of what this city has to offer. Not everyone is nice, you see, I lived across the street from someone in the midwest who died alone in her closet and everyone stepped over her as if she was garbage. I was only seven at the time so I coudn't do much.

I am not trying to argue but small towns do ignore the misfortunate, too. It is not just New York but I have seen lots of people doing great things here. It is not my crusade to defend this city, but I do like living here.

Bunny Edit: I'm not arguing that point. In fact, didn't I say there's enough shit to do here that loitering a death scene is practically gluttonous?

I'm not arguing small towns or 9/11 either. I don't know how bringing up either of those unrelated things repudiates the fact that New Yorkers were making a hoopla over a bum's death--which I saw with my own two. I've resided in LA for a year. It is the land of cold souls, and yet no one hovers over dead people for fun. This leads me to believe, along with other coldnesses I've witnessed, that while this city is spectacular, it is also apathetic.

Posted by: Denise at April 3, 2007 10:30 PM

I love New York, I love it more than any other place in the world (from what short amount of traveling I've done), but the paradox of this city always has a way of splitting me in half. One needs to be callous to get through the daily grind of living in the hornet's nest, but recently received got a jolt that made me wonder how cold I've become.

A homeless man walked onto my subway after a Yankee game, and, as is standard subway procedure, averted my eyes and looked away. Another rider mocked the bum, which triggered me to reprimand him. We may not like the constant sight, the constant demand and plea for assistance, but is this any reason to mock the poor man's self-worth, what little that remains?

As a side note, how does one clean their aura? I have a feeling I'm long overdue...

Posted by: Anthony at April 9, 2007 04:02 PM