TheBunnyBlog.com: Never judge a porn by it's cover

Never judge a porn by it's cover

Masturbation and I have a storied history. We go way back, and as I am a tad self indulgent with regard to the sensual, I visit my friend masturbation several times a day. I visit in the morning. I visit at night. I visit during my lunch hour, and it's possible that when coworkers can't find me at my desk, it is because I am rubbing one out in the ladies' room. If I could do it at my desk and not get fired, I would. Management clearly knows nothing about boosting productivity.

Tucker recently got a clever gift basket from some production company he met with to discuss his television show filled with liquor, lube and porn. Naturally, he gave the porn to me. I was excited because I thought it would be good porn. The models on the covers were sultry little vixens with perfect skin and perky breasts named "Simone" and other such nonsense. I picked one out, made sure Tucker and the dogs would be out at the dog park and plugged it into my DVD player. After the FBI Warning subsided, Simone popped onto my screen and began licking her own nipple. I was one sequence in, nicely warmed up, I might add, when the skank patrol took over. I turned the porn off and did my laundry. I was THAT disgusted.

I ask you this question: Why splay the beautiful hottie all over the cover when you're only going to fill the inside with MILF hunter rejects? This is immoral advertising at its worst.

Comments

Ugly chicks= real chicks= extra hard boner= 3 roper.

Super hot, unattainable chicks munching on some even hotter box represents something I, and most other guys out there will never have.

The chubbier and uglier, the more realistic and the more most of us can relate.

I say ENJOY!!

Bunny Edit: Oh, I am first in line for the chub, darling. I love a normal sized woman. It was the LACK of normalcy that disturbed me, the wretched skin, ratty hair, liver and Kaposi's sarcoma spots that terrified me. I don't know about you, but I don't sleep with women who look like Crypt Keepers.

Posted by: theone at June 15, 2006 12:26 AM

Only TheBunny could have guys bragging about lackadaisically jerking off to ugly chicks in a comment on her blog.

Posted by: sillylittlefreak at June 15, 2006 01:42 AM

So Tucker kept the lube and alcohol, eh? Hmmmm...

Sorry you didn't enjoy your free porn Bunny, but there's plenty more on the Internet.

Posted by: Kif at June 15, 2006 06:36 AM

Call me fucked up, but a jiggly ass and a little tummy roll gets me to full mast. Gym toned perfection just doesn't cut it as jerk off material anymore. Maybe I'm burned out?

Posted by: Leroy77 at June 15, 2006 11:17 AM

I love your word choice here. You say if you "could do it at my desk and not get fired, I would." Not "if I could do it at my desk without people looking." Brilliant.

Posted by: Mintz at July 4, 2006 09:33 PM

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