Peaches gets casted

My friend Julien, the genius behind The Beastly Bombing--which is getting rave fuckin' reviews everywhere BTW--remade Tease Magazine a few years ago. Most interestingly, I bought one of his remade copies long before I met him. Wasn't a Tease fan, more of a Barely Legal girl to be honest, but I adored the kinky articles and was genuinely dissapointed when it dissapeared from the shelves. It was a little seventy page bastion of perversion in my room, a place I could go when I got tired of North Side preppy conformity at Tin Lizzies, Carols, Goodbar and Weiner Circle.

Perhaps it was in one of my copies, but I don't remember seeing this interview, Peaches, Cynthia Plastercaster and Julien rapping about music, casting and of all god damn things, WEINER CIRCLE. Had I wandered in there--and who's to say I WASN'T there--to see Peaches and Cynthia drunk, covered in plaster and fucking with the white people, I wouldn't have known I was in the presence of greatness. I simply would have felt an unexplainable warmth by osmosis...in my crotch.

Without further ado, I give you Julien Nitzberg's interview of Peaches and Cynthia Plastercaster for Tease Magazine.

* * *

JN: Peaches, tell me how you first met Cynthia and ended up getting cast by her.

P: Well, and correct me if I miss any thing, didn't I meet you at my show with Gonzo? Was that the first time I met you?

CPC: Yeah.

P: Because I didn't meet you that time that I did that show with Magus the time before. Cynthia came to the show when I played with Gonzales and asked to plastercast both of us actually.

CPC: That's right.

P: And Gonzo said his girlfriend wasn't there and he had no fluffer so he bowed out

JN: Oh and did he ever take a raincheck?

P: No.

JN: Do you believe he was just scared?

P: Yeah. I totally know that. But for me, it was like a huge fucking deal. Like a lifetime achievement for me.

CPC: Oh God.

P: I was like, "No way!" But the thing was I had this crazy idea, and of course I wanted to be different, and stand out in some way. And I called Cynthia and asked if we could do a live casting, and if she'd ever done that before, like as part of a live performance. And she was thoroughly against it.

CPC: Yeah, I think I was shy, plus I was I don't know, I was about to go to my health club or something stupid like that.

P: I was like, "No no no." And she was like, she was making all these excuses, "I can't do it. I can't do it this way and that way." And I don't mean excuses like what couldn't be done. I think that Cynthia as an artist wanted it done correctly and properly, and my idea was just as a live experience, so I didn't think she was convinced that it would work both ways. That her work would be done in a way that she wanted to be represented.

JN: So what happened then?

P: So, so finally I convinced you didn't I?

CPC: It didn't take much.

P: We were doing this thing with Gonzales together. We were doing this performance at Weekend Records. You know that record shop?

JN: Is that in Chicago?

P: Yeah. It's in Chicago. And at the time Magus, whose record store it was, and Bridget were living there. So they had this wall between the record store and their personal living space and the wall didn't go all the way up to the ceiling, there was probably two feet where you could see over the wall if you had a ladder. So what we decided to do, me and Gonzales would do a song that had some weird high energy and we would get ourselves all worked up and I would all of a sudden disappear on the other side of the wall. And at that time a ladder would appear, and Gozales's job was to charge people a quarter and climb up the ladder and they could see me getting casted.

CPC: Do you believe that Julien? A quarter!

JN: A quarter? Was it Gonzales or you who sold yourself cheap?

P: Gonzales. And it was Gonzales who decided to bring down the price too. He realized they were just nervous to go up there. He thought that you know, maybe the price was too high so he said, "Okay! 15 cents!" My tour manager at the time was just a friend of mine, Malcolm Fraisier. His job was to do the second breast because Cynthia said the consistency of the plaster and everything had to be done at the same time. And my poor friend Malcolm had never been so close to my breasts before and had his poor little sweaty, shaking palms underneath my breast and totally flobbed and like (farting noise) and got really nervous. And Cynthia's worst nightmares came true. That one breast was not done by her and not done properly.

JN: Was the one breast messed up?

P: There's one breast that totally like (farting noise) and one that's like sticking straight up.

CPC: Well the (farting noise) one is not really that (farting noise)-looking. It looks like a sugar cookie.

P: Really nice way of putting it.

CPC: What? That's exactly what it looks like. It's like I'm staring at it right now as we speak. I'm only inches away from it and it's a very tasty, sugary-looking tit.

JN: That could be a new marketing idea.

P: Yeah, sugar tit cookies. But in the end I think it's kind of cool that they're not like the perfect boobies.

CPC: Oh no. They're very different from each other.

JN: Were you very happy with the end results?

P: Oh yeah, I'm very happy.

CPC: Oh good. I'm glad. Yeah. I'm happy too. Very happy.

JN: Peaches what did you know about Cynthia when she approached you?

P: I actually wasn't aware that she was moving on to casting breasts. I was only aware of the um, long line of penis casting. (laughs) Some longer than others.

CPC: The different shapes.

P: And of course I was amazed and thought what a fantastic idea. What a way to first of all deal with your obsession with rock stars and not falling into just being a groupie. Wanting to have your own creativity on it and also just so many reasons of why it's just a fantastic idea, such an empowering idea too.

JN: Was Cynthia all nervous when she approached you?

P: Cynthia's got a really charming shy way about her, but of course under it she's not shy at all.

CPC: Oh it varies from hour to hour.

P: And she's just such a charming, fantastic person I was just glad to meet her and that our friendship's continued.

CPC: Oh yeah. It's so mutual.

P: And that she took me to this crazy hamburger place last time I was in Chicago.

CPC: The Weiner Circle.

P: The Weiner Circle.

JN: What happened there?

P: We said we wanted to have some burgers and fries at the place across the street from our Nightliner and Cynthia kept shaking her head and looking at the ground and said, "Bad idea." And that she had a really great place to take us. All of a sudden we were in a cab going across town to the Weiner Circle where all these women were working there getting abused by all these yuppie guys, "Bitch make my hamburger!" And the women were just giving it back to them 10 times harder.

CPC: Yeah. But that's what the yuppies go there for.

P: They get all drunk and they're like (drunk yuppie voice), "Watch this--bitch where's my hamburger?" And they're like (Sassy black woman), "You little small dicked little white boy. You get in line! I give you a hamburger when I want to!"

(Peaches and Cynthia both laugh).

JN: Were you rude to the women there?

P: No. But they were pulling my hair. "What do you want bitch? What's your order bitch?" I was just laughing in amazement.

CPC: They were trying to pull her into the kitchen. It was like this mad fracas, hair flying and your tracksuit being partially pulled into the kitchen. It was like a blur of people screaming at each other.

P: And we were videotaping it. People were really drunk.

CPC: As usual.

JN: When Cynthia first approached you, were you afraid that Cynthia was going to ask to cast your genitals and instead of your breasts?

P: No, I wasn't worried at all. She can do that any time she wants.

CPC: Wow. Oh my God. I'll remember that.

P: I'll pray for you. I guess for me too because it will be pretty painful if I don't. You know Judy Chicago and stuff? That wasn't a realistic depiction of people's genitals. I don't know. I think some how that relates to your work and it's not just because her last name is Chicago and you live there. You know, it's just like this dinner party with everyone's genitals...I guess they were all plaster.

CPC: I'm more of a collector.

P: You collect plates.

(They laugh).

CPC: Um. Wow. The term plate is a cockney rhyming term for blowjob.

P: Wow!

CPC: That would be great if the blowjob could be casted or just the air...

P: The air around it?

CPC: Yeah.

(Julien laughs).

JN: Cynthia how come you don't do women's genitals?

CPC: I don't do... I don't do...I'm a specialist.

P: Sticking out.

CPC: Yeah. Sticking out. Bouncy, goofy kind of goofy sex object. I'm not sure if vixen's **** are really that sexy.

P: You know that's really funny! I think about that all the time, especially when I see men's genitals. Their whole body is like this one way, and then it's like what's that thing sticking out?

JN: What about a girl who has a gigantic clit?

P: I think that could work maybe.

CPC: Maybe.

JN: Like Vanessa Del Rio style.

CPC: But that's entering like...Ears stick out pretty far too sometimes...I'm like a stamp collector. I just want as many dicks and tits as I can get. Preferably a matched set. All of the same group, appendages belonging to a talented group of artists or musicians.

JN: (Deadpan) And Anthony Newly.

CPC: And Anthony Newly?

J: And Anthony Newly.

CPC: Julien! What are you telling me Julien? That he's not talented?

J: He's not a rocker so that's my favorite one.

CPC: Well really, not just merely rock and roll. It could be politics some day. But I don't think any time soon.

P: I think you could get Cicciolina to do it.

CPC: Ohhh Ciccolina! Yeah, I forgot about her. Is she still in politics?

P: Um no. But my friend just went to Italy and did and did like a whole interview with her. She's definitely into being out there.

CPC: Cicciolina would really be cool. She's already been part of an art installation. Oh yeah! She's kind of a renaissance woman in that way.

JN: Cynthia how did you first find out about Peaches?

CPC: My friend Mary **** told me about her record and told me to see her show and the first time I saw her was at The Empty Bottle. And I saw her, and just 5 minutes into the set I thought this is the future of rock and roll, what Madonna should have been and never was and never will be, and what every young girl's role model should be and every old girl's role model as well. Well, I knew I had to have her. I knew long before the set was over that I was going to pop the question. I couldn't believe that you were willing to be casted doll. I still can't believe it.

P: Oh my God. Of course.

Comments

Posted by: Emmaluscious at November 3, 2006 08:34 AM

Posted by: BeckyBuns at November 6, 2006 11:48 PM

Post a comment